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August 1, 2013

The PPP and JP of the NIH

Feds Spend $402,721 on Underwear That Senses Cigarette Smoke
( - May 7, 2013 - The National Institutes of Health (NIH) has awarded more than $400,000 to a research project involving underwear that can detect when a person smokes cigarettes.

The University of Alabama has received two grants totaling $402,721 for the project, which so far has produced a "very early prototype" of the monitoring system, which -- in its current state -- fits like a vest.


The goal of the three-year study is to "develop a wearable sensor system comprised of a breathing sensor integrated into conventional underwear." Continue reading HERE.

Excerpts taken from the NIH Project Information - Public Health Relevance Statement:

The goal of this research is to develop a non-invasive wearable system (Personal Automatic Cigarette Tracker - PACT) that is completely transparent to the end user and does not require any conscious effort to achieve reliable monitoring of smoking behavior in free living individuals. Editors note: These are smart people. They KNOW not to try this with free dead individuals! The PACT device will provide an accurate and precise measure of real-world smoking. The device can provide the user and health professional feedback on the frequency of smoking and inhalation patterns (such as depth of inhalation and smoke holding) throughout the day in their home and community. This information can be used to inform behavioral strategies in smoking cessation programs. The data collected by PACT can also provide an objective method of assessing the effectiveness of behavioral and pharmacological smoking interventions.

I have it on good authority (a smoker snitch at NIH) that once the PrettyPantyPact or JockPact is finally a reality, another award will be made to design a shock sensor (think dog shock collar) to be retrofitted. Its purpose will be to wean smokers off of cigerettes entirely via individually designed programs courtesy of your Obamacare Health Czar Department. SNEAKY little bastards aren't they!

Failure of any smoker to wear the PPP or JP will result in his/her assignment to the nearest reeducation center along with their whole family as we all know how important family support is in trying times.

Posted by LadyR at August 1, 2013 4:21 PM

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