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November 3, 2006

"VOTE DEMOCRAT IN 1780" ?

Topics: Humor

Ever wondered what the political positions, and talking-points, of today's Democrats would have been like in 1780? Let us see then, but be warned: "Any resemblance to real persons living or dead, and or to present political positions and or situations, is 'eerily' NOT COINCIDENTAL".

Talking-points of anti-war, secular progressive, peacenik Democrats had they been around during the Revolutionary War - From the "New York Continental Times" just days before Continental Congress elections:

"The war is going badly, and the country is divided by this unpopular war! Our young men are dying, and our Generals in the field are losing the battles in this unwinnable war! Stop the war now! VOTE DEMOCRAT IN 1780! VOTE BENEDICT ARNOLD!"

"Vote Benedict Arnold, to replace that murderous despot George Washington, who even has 'Conscientious War Dissenters' whom he disingenuously calls 'deserters' executed for refusing to fight!"

"Vote to replace this hateful man who has lost most of his battles and skirmishes in this unnecessary, and prolonged war that has cost the lives of so many of our young men, and who even failed to provide appropriately for his troops in winter at Valley Forge and to equip them with the proper gear; as some of our soldiers did not even had shoes to wear!"

"George Washington lied to the American Colonists proposing this hare-brained idea of 'Democracy' in our fractured, sectarian, 13 provinces! We'll never get the Puritans to agree with the Quakers as to the role of marriage, sex, and procreation in the community, or farmers to agree with city dwellers over taxes on grain alcohol; and so, we should divide this concocted 'Republic' into 13 loosely Federated Colonies, instead of one huge hulking nation! George Washington and those who want to have a 'Republic' and call themselves 'Republicans' are taking this country in the wrong direction! Washington and his cronies have involved us in this war only because they stand to gain from not having to pay their due 'taxes' to the Crown on the produce of their extensive estates! And we all have seen how the price of grain has risen! It is all a conspiracy!"

"As General Arnold has denounced, our troops are barging-in, under the cover of the darkness of night, into the homes of innocent 'Tories,' just because they are suspected of harboring and aiding the British, "terrifying women and children in the middle of the night'!"

"It is all but a reprehensible 'Republican' plot, that General Benedict Arnold's recent wise remarks to our young people: "You know, education, if you make the most of it at Harvard, if you study hard and you do your Greek and Latin, and you make an effort to be smart, uh, you, you can do well. If you don't, you get stuck in Valley Forge," have been twisted by these desperate so called 'Washington Republicans,' who wish to use them as a distraction from addressing the real issues concerning this failed war of George Washington, and who have even had the audacity to demand that General Arnold 'apologizes to our troops'! It is simply ludicrous! It is obvious to all of us concerned anti-war protesters, who habitually sit here at the Continental Inn sipping our French 'Lattes' and exchanging ideas about what social order and economic model best to impose upon the Colonies, that we hold this truth to be self evident: Only the sons of unlearned and uncouth oafs and farmers would be stupid enough to support G.W. and follow him into the battlefield in this immoral war! We know best"!

"George Washington has repeatedly stated that 'we must stay the course'! Benedict Arnold, on the other hand, will have 'bi-lateral talks,' and will engage in 'shuttle diplomacy' with the British. He will negotiate a lasting peace that will bring stability to the region; unlike Washington!"

"We demand that our troops be withdrawn from the battlefield and all the carnage immediately, and be 're-deployed' in the Indian Territories, to protect our borders instead!"

"Let us vote all these 'Republican' Congressmen at our Continental Congress, who have supported and 'rubber-stamped' George Washington's failed policies of 'expansionism' out of office!"

"VOTE AGAINST THE WAR! VOTE DEMOCRATIC! VOTE BENEDICT ARNOLD! LET'S IMPEACH GEORGE WASHINGTON, DECOMMISSION HIM, AND SEND HIM BACK TO HIS FARM !"




Posted by Althor at November 3, 2006 3:08 PM


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